Michael Jackson & 7-11 On A Snow Day
While I sit snowed in sipping on a very strong Irish Coffee, it got me thinking, (inebriated thinking, but at least it’s a start). Why does the entertainment industry get to be the only one with expensive award shows? What about all the “little people?” I’ve decided to give a couple awards to the various members of the Richmond community who have impacted my life for the better over the past year.
My first award will be given for Outstanding Entertainment Provided by a Homeless Person. Now this wasn’t an easy choice. While you’re average Oliver Twist-y street urchin can still be found, begging for spare change and asking, “Please sir, may I have some more,” many of them have been replaced by surprisingly talented pan handlers.
Outstanding Entertainment Provided by a Homeless Person has to go to Michael Jackson (wow, I never thought I’d get to write those words). I’m pretty sure it’s not the real Michael, partly because he’s not white and dead from taking too much Dilaudid (too soon?). But what this man lacks in genetic similarities to the King of Pop, he makes up for in his performances. During the month of November all the way through mid-December, I was treated to performances outside of my beloved 7-11. For the very reasonable price of a cigarette, or perhaps a bite of my taquito, I was able to see a fully choreographed rendition of the Jackson Five’s “ABC.”
As a stressed student, these brief escapes from my world of final exams and procrastinating truly left me feeling uplifted. I haven’t seen Mr. Jackson recently, so I’m assuming he’s found another venue. I hope to see him moonwalking, or dangling a baby out of a window in the near future. But until then, onto the next award!
Now my next award is going to Outstanding Beer/Alcohol Vender. If you’ve seen the bar scene in Richmond, you know that this is a drinking city. But what is a poor gal to do when she wants to have fun but can’t afford Shockoe Bottom, or Carytown? Well, have no fear my dear readers! I’m giving this prestigious award to none other then the 7-11 on Main and Harrison.
What separates this 7-11 from all the others, you ask? Well let’s start with the fact that Michael Jackson (mentioned above) got his start performing out front. If that doesn’t convince you, just walk through those doors.
This 7-11, while providing the normal array of 40’s and a full stock of PBR, also offers a bevy of higher-class beers. Heineken, Blue Moon, Sam Adams, and my personal favorite, Rolling Rock. And while I’m on the topic of Rolling Rock, listen up all my stoner friends! This 7-11 always has a fully stocked rack of taquitos. Don’t underestimate the importance of this.
If you’ve ever set your mind on a Buffalo Chicken taquito, only to discover that there are no more hot ones rotating on that weird grill thing, you know how powerless it makes you feel. Speaking of powerless, this snow has managed to shut down businesses, schools and even several ABC stores (which I was all sorts of pissed off about). But even during these arctic times, one place always stays open.
Now my Irish Coffee is gone. I have to sober up and get back to real life because the snow is starting to melt. I’ll escape the den that is my apartment. And I look forward to seeing my favorite people and places around Richmond again. And even though awards season is over (finally), I will continue to look for nominees in the community.
Sarah Wilson is a Theatre performance major at Virginia Commonwealth University. She enjoys candle-lit dinners and long walks on the beach. Unfortunately, Richmond offers neither.
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