It’s All in the Timing
I had every intention of coming out to my mother last week. Between Thanksgiving and everything else that was going on, there was just not a good moment to break the news. While I know that there will never be a good moment to tell my mother I am a lesbian, I think that there is a time and place for everything.
We did however start talking about some other things, and she turned to me and said, “no matter what you can always tell me, because I will always love you.” This reassured me that when I find the time to say the words, she would be there to hear them.
I received a comment from a reader last week that really touched me, so I am going to respond to it. The reader wrote:
I have lived in Richmond all my life…30 some years. I have always seen Richmond as a place that compartmentalizes people no matter who you are. While there are many things that I like about this town that has always been a problem in my eyes. I am not out to anyone, sometimes not even myself. Among the many fears that I have is what happens when I do? What are the next steps in this town? Where will I fit? Who will my friends be and how will I meet others like me? I would fall under the lipstick/femme umbrella and do not resemble the stereotypical lesbian. I find comfort in knowing there are others out there…now I just wish I could find them. Thank you for writing this article.
Thank you having the courage to share that story! I can’t begin to imagine living somewhere for 30 years and not feeling as if I could be myself.
The one thing that I have learned since being more open about my sexuality is that sometimes-close friends become the best family and support system that you can have. Finding people that understand and love you for who you are is vital to getting through the day sometimes.
When I came out to most of my current friends I knew that it was something they had to know so that we could have meaningful relationships. There have been some times when someone has been put off by me being a lesbian, and those are the times that I have learned that it is best that those people are not in my life.
If someone cannot accept you for who you are, all inclusively, then they are not worthy of being a part of your life. No matter how freeing it can be, it still takes courage and strength to be open about sexual orientation.
Lucy Lipstick blogs about her experiences from a lesbian perspective every Friday on GayRVA.
Lucy Lipstick was once a single girl, living in Richmond. She found love, and could no longer write about the meeting and greeting of prospective dates. Now she is living life, and writing about the everyday things that occur in the life of a lipstick lady living in the RIC. E-mail Lucy at firstname.lastname@example.org.
“Somehow I learned that I belonged with my people and that I had a responsibility to contribute to them.”October 20, 2015
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